|14 August 2006
Andy Maxwell stepped up to the plate and organised a hummdinger all the way to the Isle of Ulay for some decent diving and an excellent weekend. There's something very right about catching your food and throwing it on the grill that evening. There was lots of all sorts of action, and this time I have notes so there will be a bit more colour when I'm back off holiday.
Suffice it to say we found out a few things about a few people; some we'd rather not have known, some we should have guessed.
Can you spot the crazy glint in Steve's eye?
Then you have your man Steve, by day humble accountant, by night raw-flesh eating jungle commando, crawling through the undergrowth with a knife between his teeth and a Charles Manson glint in his eye. Iif it crawls, slithers, swims, floats or flies five gets you ten that he's stuck a knife in it and thrown it on the barbie. Unless it's a scallop of course, those he eats raw. Euch. I'm sorry guys, you can say "Amazing", "Fantastic" and "Delicious" all you want, it's still a cold, disgusting, slimey shellfish.
Of course, the diving would have been a whole lot better if I'd brought both my fins. Sigh, there's no amount of speculating on Gary and Andy's unnaturally close relationship that's going to get me out of that one.
La Catherine's Fancy Dress Birthday Bash
Let's just say it was good, and pictures never lie. Andy, Gary and Ross co-ordinated their outfits, which was cute. Cat didn't have much of an outfit, Neil was green, Pete May came as a pig, Holly Golilghtly was there and a very smooth John Steed. Check it.
A well-decent weekend to kick the season off! We had 12's, 15's, twinsets and Aidan even threw down some rebreather action. The water was a balmy 6c, viz was 7-10 meters, the pike were everywhere. We off-gassed at the Star Inn (they still haven't replaced the shelf Millsy pulled off the wall..) where the restaurant has now become a curry house.
Welcome on board to your man Ian, much respect for the twin set and not even batting an eyelid at sleeping in the caravan, but not quite 'ard enough to eat a pickled egg! A new, Evil Aidan Hardy came out, Pants' dry suit somehow shrunk over Christmas (particuarly in the stomach area), and YAY Sally didn't implode at five meters.
The photos are coming in and will be up soon enough and believe you me one or two of them are nasty. In the mean time, can you guess which instructor couldn't switch on his own DPV, well can ya?
The Seagull Catapult
Intrigued? Read all about it here..
Red Sea, May 2005
The photos are up, with the bare minimum of illuminating commentary; check it.
!! Wreck Discovery Weekend, 17-18 September, St Ives !!
The trip is totally sold out folks, I put it about at the last club night and was oversubscribed by the end of the evening, which goes to show its always worth coming to club nights. If you want your name added to the reserve list let me know, the spaces will be given away in the order your names are on the list. I don't anticipate any spaces coming free mind, not until quite shortly before the trip when Mel bails out.
Parachute jump for handicapped divers
Annie Walters, a PADI and IAHD (International Association of Handicapped Divers) Instructor, and her husband Pete, a PADI Open Water Diver are going to complete a sponsored Static Line Parachute Jump on 21st August 2005 (weather willing) at Headcorn Parachute Club to raise funds for several disabled students to take their Open Water courses. If you want to find out more about what Annie's doing have a look at this chatboard, for more info on this parachute jump, check it.
Ives - June 2005
Well St Ives totally rocked once again,
the weather played along, the water was calm, the viz was
easily out to 20m. There were sunfish, the possibility of
a Basker, and best of all we got a dive on the Enrico Perez
which I kid you not was a wreck of Red Sea quality, I've dived
a few in the UK but this has got to be one of the best out
there. Bright, sandy, large intact pieces, heaving with life.
Damn. Photos and a write up to follow.
Ives, May Bank Holiday
If you can bear to hear more about the
Basker weekend, the sharks, the seals, the dolphins, Keith
reclining in bed wearing nothing but a bowl of strawberries,
then read on..
The Wedding Pool
Oh good GRIEF PEOPLE! Have you any idea
how many emails, texts and calls I've had from folks getting
all uptight about the Wedding pool.None of them worried for
themselves you understand but variously expressing deep concern
for ex's on the verge of gnawing through their restraints
and at least three missed calls from someone undoutedly looking
to safeguard his dear mother's sensibilities.
Cove, January 2005
Here you go, lots of photos and a tiny
little bit of text, what do you want, it was almost half a
year ago, blood?!.
Last weekend was a weekend and a half.
The diving was the kind that makes you remember why you spend
all that money on kit in order to dive in the UK, the company
was fantastic, everything worked out so well. Our brave band,
Princess Catherine, Pete The Gland, Mark The Thumb, Rosie
the Ray of Sunshine, Phil The Shy One, Donkey and The Other
One, did some top diving. We got to see the Kintuck, the barge,
Porthminster Reef, the train wreck and don't even get Rosie
started on the seals at Seal Island! Conditions were good
throughout, viz was ten meters, the temp was into double digits,
what else can I say? Oh yes, my camera has gone so if anyone
sees it. I'm not looking at you Pete, but I'll close my eyes
and if it re-appears then we'll say no more about it all right
Top do at The Exhibition for our Oohh
Lah Lah's birthday, excellent atmos and a sound turn out.
Many many stories to tell; Rob and Pete May are nervously
looking over their shoulders no doubt..
Now, y'all that dive know that the sea
is an asset that is often overlooked 'cos the tree-huggers
have a hard time drawing attention to something that's out
of sight for most of the population. However, that doesn't
mean that it doesn't need looking after.
dived the Falmouth channel in May '03, over an area which
had been illegally dredged by scallopers the previous week.
They snuk in on a Sunday afternoon and dropped their nets
down to the bottom. These nets were weighted with steel bars
and dragged along a good eight inches below the sand, scooping
up the scallops. And every single other living thing there.
a disgusting sight, one moment you were diving over a lovely
bottom, kelp, crabs, lobsters, prawns, small blennies, wrasse
and all sorts of stuff, the next moment it was like you were
over a desert, there was literally nothing but sand. No rocks,
no plants, no fish, no crustaceans, nothing, just scraped,
Well, I can't say that the Marine Conservation
Society is going to put a gun boat in the Falmouth Channel
to blow up the next bunch of ocean-raping bastards who sneak
in to destroy what's left of it, but they're petitioning parliament
for better, properly enforced protection for marine species
and habitats, and that makes them Good People. If you'd like
to know more about the state of our waters have a look here,
if you'd like to sign their petition have a look here.
Go and have a look, you don't have to be a sandal-wearing
whale-kissing hippie to want to protect our waters.
Rescue Course, 13th
Congratulations to our new Rescue Divers
Josie, Greg, Jeff and Colin for a course well completed in
cold and murky Wraysbury this weekend. Well done Jeff for
the super-efficient completion of the Panicked Diver On The
Surface scenario, within literally two minutes I had been
disabled and towed back to shore. Kudos to Greg "Ah farkin'
lahve you" Goulding who is now the most highly qualified
chav in the club, and to the AI who forgot to zip up her dry
suit before jumping into the lake for Scenario Three. Yes,
it really does happen.
Ice Diving, February
Well done our brave Ice Divers, all
returned safely from Austria and the trip sounds like it was
a hoot, good on you's guys. Lets just bear two things in mind
though: Without a doubt Shark Diver trumps Ice Diver, live
with it. Secondly, to "Maverick
& Goose" who were tobogganing in the nude, it's
not clever and it's certainly not big.
The hardcore of divers went to Wales
at the end of December for a bit of a bimble. Friendships
were sealed, adventures were had, great beasts of the sea
fought. Go on, read all about it, you know you want to. There's
even a nekkid picture of our Vera, if you look hard enough.
Some more photos are up (Brighton),
I know its been ages and most of the people on the trips have
long since retired and moved away, but hell, they're up, whatchawant?
And so, our Penny
is off to Turkey. We'll miss her larger than life personality
and that truly spectacular corsetry; she was a brief bite
of stolen fruit scrumped from the orchard of our lives and
enjoyed as such. We hope she'll be back often and that we'll
be getting lots of invitations to summer in her palatial FCO
villa with a view of the Bospherus from the balcony and within
walking distace of all the best dive sites.
Cove November 6th-7th
Stoney was stonking, the write up is
full of pictures so it takes a minute to load. Check
St Ives, September 2004
Thanks to the incessant nagging, here's
the write up, happy now?
Some of the photo's of our lovely day's
punting in Cambridge are up too, check
Dive Day, 19th September
I'll bet you're all green with envy
that you didn't manage to bag one of the few spaces up for
this lovely day trip; well so you should be, it was a great
day, we all experienced things we'd never thought we'd see,
and came out of the other side of it better divers. Read
all about it.
7th Anniversary Party
Thanks to all of you who sent
photos in of what turned out to be a sensational night. Here are
a few of the best, trimmed and Photoshopd for maximum effect while
staying just within the protection of the law. There are also photos
of the do on Scary
Yvonne's site (along with some of her really nice travel photos)
and of course on the DLL
site; check it.
THIS IS NOT A TEST, THIS IS
ROCK AND ROLL!
The first page of the Excel
trip is up at long last, check it.
The Pants trip to Wales is up and done, thanks
to Sexual Chocolate for arranging the whole thing, and we wish him
the best of luck with the granny. Thanks to Al for some of the nice
photos of divers in the water, and to gorgeous, pouting Mel for
her underwater pictures.
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©Christopher Bean 2003
Please bear in mind that whilstI
have researched all the information contained within this site,
I am not a dive proffesional or a qualified medical expert
and the majority of content here is based upon competent dive
training and plain old common sense. Should you suspect that you
have a medical condition or issue, please
consult a dive doctorr. If you suspect that you or a fellow diver
are suffering from a life affecting or life threatening condition,
call the emergency services. To find your nearest hyperbaric chamber,